Chocolate Withdrawal
by Exotos135
Summary: Halloween has come to Royal Woods, Michigan, and Lincon Loud will soon find out what happens if his sisters go chocolate-less on Halloween!


At the city of Royal Woods, Michigan, the holiday known as Halloween had arrived and everybody was getting ready for it, specially in the Loud House. Over there, Lincoln decorated the house with the best Halloween decorations he could find: fake skeletons, cobwebs, pumpkins and so on.

"Yep, this is looking great!" Linc remarked at the decorated house. "Now I just need to make sure Clyde's working just as hard."

Linc took out a walkie-talkie and turned it on. "This is sergeant Clyde, what is it?" Clyde said through the other end.

"Don't forget Queen Ronnie!" the tomboy said through the other end as well.

And soon that turned into an argument. "Wait, why did you pick queen?"

"Because I like queens and princesses are overrated."

"But we're supposed to pick military ranks, not royal ranks."

"What's the difference?"

"Guys, stay focused!" Linc barked. "Clyde, are you and Ronnie Anne working on our special Halloween surprise?"

"Yeah, Lame-O, everything's going smoothly," Ronnie answered. "Are you sure you can keep your sisters in line on your own, though? I mean, you got like... 10... 11, well, a lot of them to watch for!"

"Don't worry about me, baby, I've dealt with these girls for the past 11 years of my life with little problem!" Linc proudly replied. "Just focus on making sure the surprise is ready for tonight, okay?"

"...Did you just call me baby?" Ronnie asked.

Linc quickly cut off the call, and at the McBride's house, Ronnie turned off her walkie-talkie as well.

"He just called me baby like it was something he could do," she recapped before smiling, "That's hot."

Back at the Loud house, Linc soon encountered his sisters, who were all looking at him with angry looks. "Oh hi girls, what's up?" he asked.

"There's no chocolate in the kitchen, or the fridge, or anywhere in the house," Lori explained. "What did you do to it, Lincoln?"

"What? You think I have something to do with the chocolate's disappearance?" Linc asked. "For what reason would I ever do that?"

"Maybe because the last time you tried to use chocolate, we ate it, causing you to have to change your station for the school fair, which in turn created your girl guru business, and which brought forth a lot of unneeded issues among your classmates because you were dumb enough to believe what we liked were things other girls liked," Lisa thoroughly explained as she adjusted her glasses.

"You could've just said he did it because we ate it last time he needed it, you know?" Leni remarked.

"I like being needlessly detailed and specific," Lisa responded.

"Whatever!" Lori shouted. "Just spill the beans, Lincoln, what did you do with the chocolate?"

"I gave it to Clyde and Ronnie in order to make a Halloween surprise for all of you," Lincoln instantly blurted.

However, the sisters reacted with confusion instead of anger. "Okay, you did that, but did you really need to use all of the chocolate available in the house?" Lori asked.

"Believe it or not, yes, it needed that much chocolate," Linc replied. "Now, unless you have further business with me, I'll ask that you leave me alone so I can decorate the house."

After a couple seconds of silence, the girls shrugged and left, but not before Lori gave Lincoln a look and hissed, "You're going to regret doing that, Linc. Be sure to keep that in mind."

Linc just waved his hand and continued with his work, when Lana returned. "Hey, if you're going to ignore Lori's warning, at least blow a raspberry at her, like this!" Lana said, blowing a raspberry afterwards.

And then Lola appeared. "Nah, that won't be enough, he needs to use his hands to motion like she was talking," Lola proceeded to move her hand like that while saying "blah blah blah" in a Leni-level of stupidity. "See? Something like that!"

Linc blew a raspberry and moved his hands to imitate the duo talking, shocking the twins. "He combined our mocking gestures!" they said in unison before strolling upstairs, giggling as Linc took a deep breath.

 _Later, at Linc's bedroom..._

The guy, having finished decorating the house, read his favorite Ace Savvy issue when he heard somebody knock the door. When he opened the door, he saw the person knocking it was none other than Lisa. "Oh hi Lisa," Linc greeted. "No offense, but I was expecting Lucy to come here, not you."

"Well, I did bring her along, just in case," Lisa said as she went in, with the emo entering the room soon afterwards. "Anyway, I have come here in order to discuss something with you. And that something is what you did with the chocolate-"

"I'm not giving either of you any chocolate," Linc stated, crossing his arms.

Lucy gasped and Lisa just barely managed to regain her composure. "Okay, well, just listen to our proposition first-"

"No, I can already tell what it is about: you're upset that I used all of the chocolate in the house for my, Ronnie and Clyde's Halloween surprise, so you want to guilt trip me into getting you something chocolate-related, like a chocolate ball or a chocolate bar," Linc responded. "But my answer's still no, you'll have to wait until the surprise is ready."

And then Lucy approached Lincoln with a poem. "Is that poem supposed to guilt trip me into doing what I just said you wanted me to do?" the boy asked. "'Cause It's not going to work."

Lucy promptly opened up her poem, saw it just consisted of "Give us chocolate," and then she immediately left the room. "Okay Lisa, you already know my answer, get out of my room too," Linc told to the little genius.

But Lisa wouldn't give up so easily. She adjusted her glasses and approached Lincoln, arms folded behind her back as she said, "Lincoln, I'm a reasonable, mature member of this family, and I will bargain for my chocolate right with you in the most mature way I can think of."

Barely a second after she said that, the girl slammed her fists into the floor repeatedly while whining, "Give me chocolate! I want chocolate!" repeatedly. And yet, Linc wasn't affected at all.

"I hear Lola's tantrums every day, I've grown numb to the annoyance they cause," he explained.

And, out of nowhere, Lola came in and joined in the tantrum. Even the combined forces of Lisa and Lola's whining could do nothing to change Linc's mind. "Would you stop embarrassing yourselves and get out of my room already?" he barked, pointing at the open door.

So the pair, realizing they weren't going to win over Lincoln anytime soon, left the room, but not before Lisa said, "By the way, according to my analysis, an extended period without chocolate in the Halloween season for the Loud House will eventually turn the choco-holics that are your sisters into monsters."

"What do you mean?" Linc asked, focusing solely on his Ace Savvy issue.

"You see, remember zombies? Those brainless undead who are really stupid and eat brains? Kind of like Leni, only somehow smarter?" Lisa replied, and Linc just nodded. "Well, we would turn into something like that, only that instead of looking for brains to eat, we would look for chocolate. So, that's why you'll regret what you did soon enough."

"I won't believe it until I see it," Linc replied.

Lisa narrowed her eyes and promptly left. "Chocolate zombies..." Linc said in contemplation. "Nah, there's no way those could ever be a thing."

 _2 hours later..._

"Ronnie, Clyde, how's the Halloween surprise going?" Linc asked to his walkie-talkie.

"Pretty good, buddy!" Clyde answered.

"We should be done with this by the time night hits," Ronnie added. "Trust me, by the time you and your sisters see it, it's going to be Epic-O!"

"Nice! I'll make sure the girls don't go crazy until then," and then Linc heard somebody growl nearby. "Speaking of which, got to go."

Linc turned off his walkie-talkie and checked the hallway, only to see Lynn playing with a ball. Surprisingly enough, she looked pretty dang angry about the situation. "Lynn, what are you doing?" Linc asked.

"Oh, you know, just playing with a ball," Lynn answered, suddenly turning happy as she asked, "Hey, can you guess what type of ball I'd like to play with right now?"

"I'm not buying you chocolate balls!" Linc hissed.

Lynn promptly leaned against a wall. "Oh come on!" she whined. "Chocolate balls are my favorite balls, next to meatballs and those balls guy's have on their crotch!"

"Well, I had to give even those to Clyde and Ronnie, so-"

"Lincoln!"

The duo flinched and turned around to see Lisa was nearby. "Oh, Lisa, I didn't see you there," Linc and Lynn said in unison. "Jinx!" Lynn soon added.

"Listen, I have analyzed the house and it seems we forgot to buy candy to give the trick or treaters," the little genius explained. "Mom wants two of us to go and buy some candy."

"Fine, I'll go, but who comes with me?" Linc asked.

Literally a couple seconds later, Linc was at the candy store with Lola by his side. "My whining may not have worked, but I'm sure my skills at persuasion will more than make up for it now," Lola said. "I'll pester you and remind you to buy some chocolate constantly!"

"Just like how you do in general," Linc scoffed. "Come on, let's buy some candy."

So the pair begun their candy shopping. Linc took a couple marshmallow bags, and Lola soon said "Remember to buy chocolate" after he put it on the basket. Up next he grabbed a bunch of lollipops, and Lola said "Linc, remember the chocolate!" while visibly showing annoyance. The third time, Linc took a jawbreaker while Lola grabbed a nearby free sample of the candy, broke it with her teeth... somehow, and hissed "Buy the dang chocolate!"

But that didn't faze Lincoln. And by the time the boy approached the counter, Lola stopped him on his tracks and whined, "Linc, we're almost done with the shopping and I haven't seen you buy any sort of chocolate whatsoever!"

"Oh, are you so sure?" Linc smugly said with a smirk as he reached for his pocket and took out a chocolate bar. "Then what's this?"

"A chocolate bar!" Lola said blissfully, only to grow suspicious. "Wait, how long have you had it in your pants?"

"I've been keeping it for myself later, but I could give it to you in exchange for a favor," Linc answered. "Convince everybody that you failed to get me to buy the chocolate, and I'll give you this chocolate bar, capiche?"

"Well, I say-" suddenly, Lola leaped straight for Lincoln. "Give me that chocolate!"

Soon after the brawl begun, Linc snatched Lola's tiara, separated from her and took out his tongue, "Accept the deal, or I'll lick your tiara!" he warned.

"Linc, don't!" Lola exclaimed. "The ego and pretentiousness in that tiara is too much for a human being!" when Linc made it clear he was going to lick the tiara, Lola added, "Okay, I'll accept the deal!"

Linc smirked and threw both the tiara and chocolate bar to Lola, who gleefully took both of them back.

 _Back at the Loud House..._

Linc and Lola came in, both whistling to avoid raising suspicion. Linc put the candy he bought on the bowl, and he and Lola went to their rooms as the remaining sisters checked it like wild animals. "Hey, there's no chocolate in here!" Luna exclaimed.

So the sisters quickly went to Lola and Lana's bedroom, only to see Lola about to eat the chocolate bar. "My twin, you betrayed us for a simple chocolate bar?!" Lana exclaimed, feeling betrayed.

"Hey, don't worry, I'll definitely share this..." Lola opened the bar and soon saw it was coffee chocolate what she got, "Coffee chocolate?! Ew!"

Lola threw it onto the floor and, as Leni, Lori, Lynn, Luna and Luan fought over it, the younger Louds reunited. "I allowed Linc to get away with not buying chocolate for a coffee chocolate bar!" Lola exclaimed, hugging herself and shivering. "That's cruel, even for me!"

"Clearly, whatever Lincoln, Clyde and Ronnie have planned, they don't want us to have any chocolate whatsoever," Lisa argued, twiddling her fingers as she continued. "Which means that in order to find out what happened to the chocolate, we must wait until that surprise is over..."

And all the sisters froze in fear as Lisa finished with, "Which means, no chocolate until nighttime!"

 _At Nighttime..._

Lincoln leisurely strolled through the hallways to his room, at least until he saw Luna and Lucy standing in a single spot, seemingly groaning. "Um, guys, what's wro-"

When the duo turned around, however, Linc flinched as he saw their eyes were bloodshot and crying, "Hi Lincoln!" Luna shouted. "Is your special surprise ready?"

"Um, I'm about to figure it out," Lincoln answered. "So, just hang on a second."

"Good, tell us when you have an answer," Lucy said.

So Lincoln went forward to his room... while Lucy and Luna watched him, with wide smiles and their eyes firmly looking at him. And then, he came across Lynn, who was licking her football while looking just as demented as Lucy and Luna. "Lynn, what are you doing?" Linc asked.

"I'm trying to eat this football, I wanted to see if it tasted like chocolate!" Lynn snapped, shortly before turning happy, "Although, it tastes more like pork than anything," then she got ready to throw the football at Lincoln, "Here, have a taste!"

Linc dodged the football and bolted to his room, wherein he slammed the door shut and immediately reached for his walkie-talkies. Just as he turned it on, however, most of his sister-outside of Leni and Lisa-kicked the door open and watched Lincoln with demented eyes and drooling grins. "Okay, calm down, I'll ask now!" Linc pleaded before talking to the walkie-talkie. "Clyde, Ronnie, is the Halloween surprise ready?"

"Not really, Linc, we still need about 15 minutes to finish it," Clyde answered. "But don't worry, 15 minutes should pass in the blink of an eye!"

The object turned off, and as Linc gave his sisters a nervous smile, their grins turning into grimaces as they realized what this meant... all except for Leni, who blinked once. "Have the 15 minutes passed yet?" she asked.

"Uh, no," Linc nervously answered. "It seems you'll have to wait a little longer before getting your surprise..."

Soon afterwards, they started laughing... and laughing... and laughing... and, without warning, Luna slammed her guitar on the ground, trying to hit Lincoln.

But the boy quickly escaped his room and closed the door, trapping his sisters for the moment. Seeing the window of opportunity was open, Lincoln ran all the way downstairs and reunited with Lisa, who was busy watching the TV.

"Lisa, you were right!" Linc shrieked. "Our sisters have turned into chocolate zombies!"

"No, Lincoln, they're not chocolate zombies. They're something far worse," Lisa turned around and revealed she was just as demented as her sisters. "Chocolate wights!"

Linc screamed before asking, "What's a chocolate wight?"

"I don't know, but wights are barely understood, just like what we became, but it seems that we grow smarter and obsessed with chocolate," Lisa explained. "Even Leni has had an upgrade in intelligence."

The duo turned around and saw Leni playing a basic memory game, which she managed to win in a couple of seconds. She giggled and clapped her hands afterwards.

"She's still got a long way to go before she has a decent IQ, though," Lisa added. "So, what about the Halloween surprise?"

Linc nervously answered, "It still needs 15 minutes before it's finished."

Soon realizing what this meant, Lisa and Leni laughed like maniacs as Lincoln backed away into the door, which he opened once the duo began running after him. However, Linc knew this would only stop his sisters for so long, so he ran away as fast as he could before the sisters escaped, opened the door and sent Lana and Lynn as watchdogs after Lincoln.

"Go our pretties!" Lori barked. "Go and find Linc and make him show you where he took all the chocolate!"

As Lori laughed like a maniac, Leni was quick to point out, "Wait, won't Lynn and Lana, like, just eat the chocolate once they find it?" and this brought Lori's laughter to a halt. "That is, if they do find it in the first place?"

A couple seconds of silence later, Lori hissed "Come back here!" and chased after the dog-like duo, with the rest of the sisters soon following suit.

 _Back with Lincoln..._

The boy hid behind a tree and sneaked from bush to bush, occasionally taking out his head to see if his sisters were coming. "I should've known depriving my sisters of chocolate was a bad idea!" he thought. "I need to get to Clyde's house and help him and Ronnie finish the surprise as fast as possible!"

And so he continued to sneak closer and closer towards the McBride house, while his sisters tried to smell his scent. Once he saw them approach him, he bolted to the house, went inside... and his sisters managed to spot him nevertheless. "There he went, to the McBrides!" Lynn exclaimed, pointing at the house.

"Okay, girls, let's go to that-" Lori barked.

"Wait!" Leni exclaimed. "Maybe the McBrides will, like, have some candy, and by a lesser extent chocolate. Maybe we should go trick or treating just in case?"

 _One clothes swap later..._

The sisters were now dressed for trick or treating: Lola was Frankenstein's monster's wife, Lana was Frankenstein's monster, Leni was Santa Claus, and so on and so forth.

"Being a chocolate wight has greatly improved your intelligence, Leni," Lisa remarked, dressed as a monkey.

"I know, it feels really weird," Leni said.

"Okay, now let's go-" Lori said, dressed like a dog.

"Wait!" everybody looked at Leni again. "All this sniffing for Linc's scent has made me hungry, anybody want ice cream?"

"I'm _cool_ with that!" Luan, dressed like a jester, said with a chuckle.

 _One ice cream shopping later..._

The sisters leisurely ate their cream, some more leisurely than others, if Lynn downright devouring her ice cream in a single bit was any indication. "Okay, we're done with this, can we now-" she growled.

"Wait!" Leni shouted.

"What's the bloody issue now!?" Luna hissed.

Leni scratched her head. "Did any of us buy chocolate ice cream?"

The instant the sister's realized what this meant, they yelled "Oh come on!" in unison and loud enough to shake the ground.

 _Meanwhile, with Ronnie and Clyde..._

The duo barely stood in place as the basement shook violently. "What's going on?!" Clyde asked as Lincoln arrived.

"It's my sisters! They turned into chocolate wights because they spent too long without eating chocolate!" Linc desperately and hastily explained. "I don't have time to explain it any better, for now, we need to finish this Halloween surprise fast! Are you with me?"

Clyde and Ronnie immediately nodded and shook hands with Linc.

Not too long afterwards, the Loud sisters knocked the door and the McBrides answered. "Trick or treat!" the girls said in unison.

"Huh, I'm surprised to see the older Louds go trick or treat with the younger ones," Harold remarked.

"Give us your dang candy, you old farts!" Lynn barked.

This earned her a smacking from Leni. "Now, Lynn, be polite," she said. " _Please_ , give us your dang candy, you old farts."

The McBrides smiled and handed the girls some candy. However, not a single candy among those were the ones they were looking for. "Where's the chocolate?" Lori asked.

"Oh, we don't have any chocolate candy at the moment," Howard answered. "I'm pretty sure Clyde should have some, though. He said he needed it to make some big Halloween surprise."

"So that's why Clyde has dark skin! He's been eating the chocolate all along!" Leni exclaimed in "contemplation."

"You know what? I take it back, Choco-Wighthood has not made you smarter in the slightest," Lisa rolled her eyes. "Do you mind if we come in? We saw Lincoln go in."

The McBrides fell silent. "We'll just see Lincoln and then leave," Lori clarified.

The gay couple immediately chirped, "Oh, in that case, come in!"

The sisters went inside and bolted their way to the basement, with the construction noises coming from there becoming louder and louder as they approached it. Once they kicked the door open, what they saw left them in shock: a bunch of chocolate replicas of the sisters, with Linc, Ronnie and Clyde catching their breath nearby.

"Ladies and... well, just ladies, I present you the Loud Sister Chocolate Replicas!" Linc exclaimed as Ronnie and Clyde tried to promote the replicas. "Made 100% out of chocolate, and based after the most significant traits exhibited by each sister, these chocolate replicas are as accurate as they are delicious, and they're very accurate."

The sisters, however, didn't seem to even realize Lincoln was talking to them. All they focused was on the delicious, available, succulent, sweet replicas of themselves, made of the chocolate they had been deprived of for so long. So, it was no surprise when they leaped straight for the replicas and started to eat them.

What was surprising, however, was how brutal they were while they ate them: they ripped their pieces apart, bit several body parts together, and even ate what looked like veins and organs made out of chocolate. When Linc said they were accurate, he certainly wasn't kidding.

"You know, if it weren't for the fact that these are the originals eating a bunch chocolate replicas, this would be very disturbing," Clyde optimistically remarked, earning himself a baffled look from Ronnie and Lincoln. "You're right, this is disturbing nonetheless."

After a couple minutes, the replicas had been completely devoured, and the satisfied Louds laid on the ground in a sight to be envied. In fact, Linc, Ronnie and Clyde looked like they could eat something right now...

"So, let me get this straight: you took all of the chocolate to make chocolate replicas of us so we could eat them in a mock massacre?" Lori asked. "This is the best Halloween surprise ever!"

"Yeah, although the massacre bit was something you improvised," Linc said, licking his lips.

"There's just one thing that's bothering me, why did my replica lack a brain?" Leni inquired.

"There wasn't enough chocolate for another brain, sorry," Clyde replied, twiddling his fingers.

"And besides, it was more accurate that way," Ronnie chuckled, earning what could best be described as a wimp slap by Linc. This somehow still managed to hurt her, "What? It's true!"

"Well, in any case, I guess the three of us learned our lessons," Linc said as Ronnie and Clyde went to his side.

"And what's that lesson?" Lori asked.

Suddenly, the trio's fingernails turned into claws, they gained sharp teeth and red, glowing eyes as they said in unison, "I want chocolate!"

The Loud sister could only shriek and run away as the trio leaped for the readers while screaming, "Chocolate!"


End file.
